As part of a greater conversation about the experience of independent artists and small nonprofits, I was invited to be a guest panelist at NDEO’s “Re-Framing and Re-Energizing: Dancers, Choreographers, and Companies in the Time of COVID.”

I spoke on behalf of freelance choreographers in the commercial field, highlighting that with independence comes a lack of support during something like…well, a pandemic. The choice to remain a freelancer and find work by following the money has distinct drawbacks:

• No unemployment
• No retirement or 401K
• No support system provided by employer

When I think of the shows I direct and install, the places I travel to, and the people I work with, I have zero regrets. I was thriving as an independent choreographer and now I am back to survival mode. That’s it. I’m good at hustling. I come up with new ways to generate cash, and I feel gratitude for every single opportunity that has come my way in the past few weeks.

Hearing Differences

The difficult thing for me has been listening to and reading suggestions from choreographers and leaders in the dance industry who are among the elite. Even during my webinar, every person before me stated:

• “I am gainfully employed.”
• “I am a professor and I am grateful to stay employed.”

Statements like these show there are those in the dance field who are doing just fine financially. Emotionally, turmoil and uncertainty may exist, however, their paychecks have not yet been affected.

In reading Raja Feather Kelly’s article in Dance Magazine recently, “Has Anyone Asked Artists What They Really Need,” he discusses being in an elite position where he and people within his network of downtown dancers in New York receive funding and produce shows at top-notch venues. The point of the article is these artists may need space to create, emotional counseling, or new ways to connect. Providing better customer service is one error these funding organizations are making. Previously funded artists should be asked “how can we help you?” By sending those artists requests for funds, the organizations are missing an opportunity.  Kelly is pointing out there is a major lack of communication. Artists need to be asked what they need right now and being hit up for money isn’t one of those needs.

However, Raja Feather Kelly is in an elite position. He has received grants, big funding, and been presented by large organizations like New York Live Arts. Kelly’s point is incredibly valid, and the question is a poignant one right now.  (to read the full article click here).

“What do artists really need right now?”

I need to hear more voices like my own.

I am not part of Raja Feather Kelly’s downtown NYC dance scene. I would love to have that level of success and I read about choreographers like Kelly with rapt interest. However, I live in a small town. I travel for the work I do as a choreographer and director. I’ve never had a show presented and funded by an organization like New York Live Arts

Right now, I want to hear other stories, stories from outside of NYC. I want to hear about hustlers in Detroit, Oklahoma City, Dallas, Raleigh, and elsewhere. I want to reach out and tap into the part of the dance ecosystem that more resembles my current state. As much as we have all loved hearing about New York artists, there are a LOT of spaces in this country where dance is being made. I want to hear different stories.

Speaking my truth

In planning what I would say to introduce myself, I planned a thoughtful, optimistic, energetic introduction. As I listened to speakers discuss being fully employed, though, I realized most of the panel was experiencing a very different life from my own. Several of the currently employed speakers may lose funding and work in the coming months, but as I had all work suspended weeks ago, they could not understand my process of combing together side hustles to make ends meet. One speaker told dance makers to not offer free classes. For he and the members of his company, I agree; they should NOT offer free classes. The funds generated by Zoom classes will help to pay more staff than just the performer teaching.

However, I am an independent, freelance artist. 

I need to offer what I can, when I can, in the manner in which I can.

Stay Active and Relevant

No one knows what to do in a pandemic. There is no solution, there is no path to follow to success. There is no guarantee of thriving as a freelance choreographer currently. The full impact of COVID on the dance industry will take months and years to fully understand. In the meantime, what can we do during this time of forced adaptation?

My deep desire currently is to stay active and relevant within my field. I offer donation-based Zoom dance classes, and I am grateful for every person who shows up to class. I stay connected and people keep moving. I also gain the opportunity to hear more stories of my friends, people within my network, and hear how they feel and listen to what they need. We cannot sugarcoat this moment. We have to take notice of all our emotions. Notice when we are angry, frustrated, ecstatic over learning new skills, or happy to reconnect in new ways. I paid attention when I felt disappointed that even on a panel discussing experiences as dance artists in the time of COVID, I was in the minority. With 382 viewers logged in, I needed to bring a voice to those dance artists like myself, already unemployed with indefinitely suspended work. I hustle. There is no shame in the hustle, and I want others like myself to feel like they have someone hustling HARD beside them.

We have to feel a full spectrum of emotions, and we have to hear a full spectrum of stories.